The ABC’s of Kindergarten: What your Kindergartener Needs to Know (Plus a free download!)
Photo by Taylor Heery on Unsplash
Kindergarten Readiness is a hot topic these days. What does your child REALLY need to know before starting school for the first time?
As a Kindergarten teacher, I truly believe it has little to do with academics and has a lot more to do with setting up your child to succeed in an environment where you are NOT there to help them. (I’m sorry, I know this is a devastating thought. My daughter is only 3.5 and I can’t think about this for too long either).
The ABC’s are wonderful, so keep singing that song and talking about letters AND sounds. But I thought it would be fun to tell you some of the REAL ABC’s of Kindergarten - what sorts of knowledge, skills, and practice your child should have and be working on before that big first day.
I’ll throw in a few of the more “academic” skills, but this list is really not about that. I’ll save all that stuff for another day, because it’s important. But what’s most important is that your kiddo feels confident and ready to tackle the social landscape of school.
Before we dive into it, if you would like to download a printable copy of this list, go ahead and do that here!
A - Accept redirection. It’s important that your child can accept redirection from a grown up. For some children, this will be easy. For others, they may need some explicit conversation about how this will go, what they can say, and why it is important.
Alphabet. Sing the song, practice identifying the letters in their name, look for letters in the world. Connect these letters to the sound they make - reading and writing is as much about HEARING sounds as SEEING letters. For the longest time, my daughter was obsessed with finding “Y sticks” in our yard. Make letters and sounds part of your play, rather than a serious task.
B - Bathroom. Teach your child to use the bathroom independently, from beginning to end. They should know how to ask or signal that they need to go, advocate when it is an emergency, turn on the light, unbutton, go, WIPE, flush, WASH, and button back up or zip. On their own. Every year I get a few kids asking me to wipe their butts and I have to say “Sorry! Not my gig.”
Breakfast. Make sure your child has a healthy and filling breakfast to start the day. Try to limit processed foods and sugars.
C - Cooperation. This simply takes exposure to other children most of the time and letting them play freely, discuss, make decisions, and solve problems as a group. When adults intervene too much, it takes their confidence away to know they can handle a disagreement themselves. If your child has difficulty cooperating with others, then you can start doing some role play at home of different scenarios (Say things like, “what if I want that toy too?” or “What if I don’t think we should play that game? What should we do?” and “how can we solve this problem together?”)
D - Draw! Drawing is such a powerful activity. Before your child will learn to write, they will draw to teach and tell stories. Give them the opportunity often to draw freely and also practice “representational” drawing, or drawing what they see or what happened in their “story.” Don’t emphasize perfection. Mistakes are important and the process of drawing (or anything really) is loads more important than the product itself.
E - Explore. Children have a natural curiosity and tendency to explore. This is how they learn. Nurture and foster it!
Emergency. teach your child what to do in an emergency. They should know a phone number, their full name, address, and how to dial 911. Have an emergency plan in place at home for fires. Teach what to do if they are approached by a stranger or someone who is making them uncomfortable. Teach how to look for responsible grown ups to help when there is a problem. It’s not fun to think about any of these things, but it’s important.
F - Follow directions. Teach your child how to follow directions. Start with 1-step directions (wash your hands). Allow process time, and teach them how to ask for clarification.Build your way up to 2-step directions (wash your hands, then put on your shoes), and then 3-step directions (wash your hands, put on your shoes, and meet me by the door). Be clear, direct, and don’t assume that if your child isn’t listening it’s because they are being difficult. It just might be difficult for them to understand what you are asking them to do.
Fine Motor. Get those finger muscles nice and strong! Please don’t worry whether your child can write all their letters before kindergarten. They will learn that. What you should worry about is whether their fingers are getting lots of exercise so they are READY to write and hold a pencil. How can you support this? Play dough, coloring, digging, building with blocks or legos, playing with beads, using tweezers or clothespins to pinch small objects or pom-poms, lacing, cutting and gluing, zippering, buttoning, stickers. So many FUN things will get these muscles going and it is SO important. So many kids dislike writing because it’s simply uncomfortable for their little hands.
G - Games. Play board games! They help develop loads of skills such as cooperation, counting, colors, turn-taking, winning and losing, and more. Plus, they are just fun and a great way to connect as a family.
H - Hold a book. Does your child feel comfortable holding a book? Do they know how to make it face the right side up? Can they find the cover, the back, the spine? Do you they know where to “start” reading and that we move from left to right?
I - Identify and count numbers. Can your child identify numbers? I would start with 0-5, and then work your way up to 10! Go on hunts around the house looking for the numbers, point them out when you are running errands, do number puzzles, etc. Make sure you also connect the number names or digits to the quantity (i.e. when they count 4 bears, that corresponds to the digit “4”). When counting, emphasize pointing to and touching each item one at a time as they say each number out loud.
J - Jump on in! Practice leaving mom, dad, or other caregiver for a period of time. Nerves are normal and OK, but practice will ease them a bit. Also, be sure to discuss the first day ahead of time. Take a walk around the classroom and school if you can. Point out the bathroom, and talk about how the day might go (big picture). The more you take the mystery out of it, the easier it will be.
K - Kindness. Read lots of books on kindness, discuss what kindness looks like, sounds like, and feels like. Teach them how to speak up if someone is being unkind, and how to ask for help when others are being unkind. Kindness can mean lots of things - fair, inclusive, open-minded, being a good friend, sharing, etc. Don’t forget to include how to be kind to one-self.
L - Listen. Is your child able to listen to a story or an adult give a small lesson? This might be work practicing, especially if your child has not been in a school setting yet. Kindergarten lessons are *hopefully* all rather short, but start showing your kiddo what it means to be actively listening to someone else with their full body.
Love learning. Learning happens in the classroom, but also at home everyday. Keep it fun and positive so that your child develops a positive association with school and a true desire to learn, not just to please others.
Lunch. As parents, it's important to understand that a young kindergartner's lunch period is QUICK. The time allotted for eating is often shorter than we might expect. To help their children navigate this challenge, parents can practice efficient eating habits with their kiddos so they can finish their meal before time runs out. Also, if your school offers hot lunch, have your child practice ordering for themselves when out and about so they can do this confidently in the lunch line!
M - Matching. Can your child sort and match objects of various characteristics? Have them help you match socks at home! Sort toys of various shapes and colors, do sticker matching, and you can even sort letters based on their qualities (straight lines, curvy, upper-case, lower-case) when they are ready for that. If they aren’t, don’t push it. Again, if they are ready, you can have them match upper and lower case letters.
N - Name. Can your child recognize their first name? Your child’s name will most likely be all over their kindergarten classroom. Think of how comforting it might be if they were able to walk in and recognize their own name in this new place.
O - Open lunch and snack independently . Work on this now! Lunch and snack time go FAST. Your kiddo will lose a lot of eating time if they are waiting for an adult to help them with everything. Also practice cleaning up - throwing away trash, putting away all containers, and zipping up the lunchbox. For all things like this, don’t wait until you are trying to leave the house in the morning. You will all be super stressed and it won’t be enjoyable. Make it a game or activity while you are making dinner!
P - Patience. Can your child wait for adults to be done talking without interrupting? Can they wait their turn when other children are being helped? Practice waiting in line and taking turns - but also teach them to speak up if they are not getting the help they need.
Pencil grip. Start working on developing finger muscles like I discussed above, and also practice holding a pencil the right way. Please know that finger muscle development happens BEFORE a child can hold a pencil correctly. So if this is hard for them, stick with the fine motor activities and let their grip go for a bit.
Persist. How does your child handle challenges? Praise when they keep trying when things are difficult rather than giving up. Read books about persistence. Do not emphasize perfection or criticize mistakes. It’s all in the process.
Participation. Encourage your child to be an active participant in conversations and discussions. It’s normal to feel shy at first, but they will absorb so much by asking questions and adding their perspective.
Personal information. Teach your child their full name, birthdate, address, and phone number.
Q - Ask questions. Ohhh I love this one. Teach your child and model often how to ask questions. This is the crux of learning. Ask questions when walking in the park or staring out the window on a rainy day. The simple phrase, “I wonder…?” can spark a beautiful conversation. Also teach your child to ask questions when they are confused, unsure, or need help. Self-advocacy in the classroom is huge.
R - Respect & responsibility. Teach your child to respect themselves, others, and people’s belongings. They also should learn to take responsibility for their actions, and be responsible for their own belongings.
Rhymes. Rhyming is SO important! Honestly, we could do a whole series of blog posts about the importance of singing, rhyming, and oral storytelling. They set an incredibly strong foundation for later literacy skills. Read lots of books with rhymes, read and recite nursery rhymes, sing silly rhyme songs, and tell stories out loud. Also note that kids will be able to identify a rhyme (cat and bat rhyme, cat and pin do not) before they can generate a rhyme (what rhymes with hat?).
S - Scissors. These can be intimidating, but there are lots of great options for little ones out there. Don’t let your kid’s first experience with scissors be on the first day of Kindergarten. Honestly, I started making all these tracing pages for my daughter that she wanted nothing to do with. So then I just started giving her construction paper and scissors and letting her have at it. I gave her a bucket for the scraps and it was always a solid 20 minutes of intense focus. Now she’s better able to handle the tracing pages - but figuring out how to hold them and which hands/arms to move and when is just a beast. Start practicing!
Sequence. Practice retelling stories in order. You can even work on this skill by narrating your day. First we woke up, then we went to the park, next we had lunch, etc. This helps them use those words with greater ease and develop a stronger concept of time. Kids will know that lunch comes after math before they understand that lunch is at 12.
Seeks adult help for conflicts. It can be tricky for a child to learn when to solve a problem independently v. when to seek out an adult’s help. Praise problem solving behavior AND recruiting an adult when necessary.
Sound play. Reading and writing words is a lot easier when kids can hear and manipulate the sounds in words. Learning letter sounds is more beneficial than simply identifying letters. I prefer to teach both at the same time. This is C! C makes the /k/ sound, like in your name! C-C-C-Cora! C-C-C-Cupcake! C-C-C-Cat! Do this all the time! Talk about beginning sounds, rhymes, and silly sounds. Match rhyming words (use pictures), break apart words into syllables by clapping and counting (Co-Ra! 2 claps!), play “I Spy” with sounds (I spy something that begins with /t/, /t/,/t/; or I spy something that has the sounds /d/ /o/ /g/ - can they blend those sounds together?).
T - Tidy. Teach your kid to tidy up after themselves!
Take turns. Taking turns will be an essential part of the classroom. Teaching them the language to support this will help. Teach your child to notice when someone else is busy with something, and say, “Hi ______, when you are done with that red marker can I have a turn with it?” or “I’m almost done with the glue stick, I’ll pass it to you once I finish.”
Transitions. There are a lot of transitions in a kindergarten classroom. Practice giving warnings to end an activity, cleaning up, and moving to a new area for a new activity. It may be hard to move on before they feel “finished,” and this takes some practice. Talk about how the day will go. Discuss how after a little while, recess ends, and you go back inside with the class, but you’ll go back out tomorrow.
U - Use words to communicate feelings, frustrations, and ideas. This takes YEARS of practice and repetition. Something I’ve learned? Validate their opinions and feelings, even when it seems ridiculous to you. It’s not ridiculous to them - I promise. Help your child label their feelings, and be there for them during the BIG feelings. Don’t tell them they are being silly, or to stop crying. Instead say, “I can see you are so frustrated. You didn’t want that to happen. I’m here for you.” Once calm, then discuss how they can solve the problem, or calm down, or whatever the issue is. This helps them identify with and process their emotions, developing stronger emotional regulation over time. In the long run, you’ll have a child that feels comfortable coming to you with whatever problem, big or small, they are facing. When they are in high school, you’ll be glad you invested all that emotional energy (it IS exhausting).
V - Verbal storytelling. Tell and retell stories out loud! This is excellent for developing language, vocabulary, and getting reading for reading. Practice using storytelling language (first, then, later, finally, all of a sudden, one afternoon…”. Model your own rich language and prompt your child to elaborate when telling their own stories. Your child will begin to adapt this language when “reading” their books (although I truly consider this true reading for this age and a necessary state in reading development) and its adorable and so fun to watch.
W - Wash. Teach your kiddo to properly wash and dry their hands. Cold season comes quickly!
X - EXpresses ideas. Give your child plenty of time to practice expressing their ideas, play with language, and just talk to you and others. Let them draw to communicate, and help them attach vocabulary to the things they see, hear, and talk about everyday. Read lots of books, discuss them, study the pictures together, and ask questions.
Y - YOU. Take care of YOU and give yourself a break when you need it. Don’t worry about things being perfect, because they won’t be. Ask your child’s teacher for help, clarification, and resources when you need them.
Z - Zip! Practice zipping those jackets NOW! Seriously. It doesn’t always need to happen while you are rushing out the door in the morning but you need to practice. While you wash the dishes, your kiddo can be troubleshooting the zips on their jackets, pants, backpacks, and wherever else. Their teacher will have anywhere from 12-25 other kids in the class, and zipping everyone up is not really practical.
Zzz - Sleep! Get into a strong bedtime and sleep routine so you can encourage your little one to start their day well-rested.
I hope this helps you and your little one as your get ready for that big first day of Kindergarten! I would love to hear what you would add to this list.
I made a PRINTABLE PDF version of this list so you can stick it somewhere handy and refer to it whenever you would like!
